Formula for Disaster

Kim had a shindig at Church tonight, so she set out Iain's evening bottle so I could feed it to him before bed. We use the bottles that consist of a plastic tube with a disposable plastic liner. Kim was in such a hurry she poured the formula powder in the bottle without putting a liner in it. Then she put a liner in the bottle and swept the formula powder off the counter and into the bottle. In retrospect that is was what they call "foreshadowing."

Iain was looking sleepy so I filled his bottle with warm water and secured the nipple with the plastic ring. I started shaking it up and it was leaking everywhere! I looked at it like a puzzled chimpanzee for a bit, tightened the ring some more, and started shaking again. It started leaking worse and then the plastic liner fell out of the bottle! I didn't even think that was possible. It is. So now Iain was sprinkled with formula (Um, Dad, what's all this stuff on my head?), the front of my jeans was doused with the stuff, and it was all over the kitchen floor.

I did the only thing possible at this point. I said a few choice words that will get Iain in a lot of trouble if he ever repeats them in front of Kim. Come to think of it, *I* will get in a lot of trouble if I repeat them in front of Kim. Then I mopped up the formula and made a new bottle, which worked fine. I think Kim sabotaged the first one. Or maybe the liner was defective? Has anyone heard of a recall on baby bottle liners?

To add insult to injury, Iain would only drink half of the bottle. Stinker.